making them look good

I was going to write a review of the latest Wolfgang Petersen film, Troy (04), but because it was one of the most poorly executed films in recent memory (and gets only 1 star, for Peter O'Toole), I decided instead to do a quick tribute post to Dick Durock.

Whether you remember him as "Swampy" from both DC comic-based Swamp Thing films (the second being a true classic of the superhero film genre) as well as appearing as the character in 74 episodes of the TV series, or from any number of bit parts in Clint Eastwood films (The Enforcer, Any Which Way You Can) one thing's for sure: they don't make 'em like Dick anymore. It's true, he's become something of a self-admitted caricature of himself (much like that other Hollywood luminary - and personal hero of mine: William Shatner) but he mostly earned his stripes in the industry by being the guy who takes the fall for the "big-name" actor in a film. Just look at his stunt credentials and you'll start to see just how long this Man's been around (sometimes doing stunts on as many as 2 seperate shows in one day). I wish he had more exposure now than what he does, but his gifts reside in the films that he is most remembered for: The Swamp Thing, and The Return of Swamp Thing. And if you don't believe me when I say that The Return of Swamp Thing is a "perfect" movie (for what it is), go watch Troy, and you'll see what I mean.

The Best of Dick as Actor:

The Enforcer (76) ****
The Nude Bomb (80) ***1/2
Any Which Way You Can (80) ****
Swamp Thing (82) ***
They Call Me Bruce? (82) **
Silverado (85) ****1/2
Raw Deal (86) **1/2
Stand by Me (86) ****
Blind Date (87) ***
Mr. North (88) ****
The Return of Swamp Thing (89) *****
Delirious (91) ***
Swamp Thing (91-93, series)
Die Hard: With a Vengeance (95, uncredited) ***1/2

The Best of Dick as Stunt-Man:

Lost in Space (65, series)
Star Trek (68, series)
The Beverly Hillbillies (67-71, series)
The Grissom Gang (71)
Conquest of the Planet of the Apes (72)
Kung Fu (72, series)
The Poseidon Adventure (72)
Battle for the Planet of the Apes (73)
The Six Million Dollar Man (74, series)
The Rockford Files (74, series)
F.I.S.T. (78)
Buck Rogers in the 25th Century (79, series)
1941 (79)
Bronco Billy (80)
Magnum, P.I. (80, series)
History of the World: Part I (81)
The Fall Guy (81, series)
The Sword and the Sorcerer (82)
The A-Team (83, series)
Ewoks: The Battle for Endor (85)
Runaway Train (85)
Howard the Duck (86)
License to Drive (88)

The Best of Dick as Himself:

VH-1 Where Are They Now: Superheros (03, TV)

"I usually played big mean thugs who the hero of whatever show I was doing at the time and would beat the %$@&^# out of. From Clint Eastwood and Charlie Bronson, etc., in feature films to Jim Garner, Tom Selleck, Lee Majors and whole bunch of others in TV. I worked a lot because of my size (6'5"- 215lbs) and kind of a rough look. Film heroes like to beat up guys bigger than they are....makes them look good and believe me, I made a lot of them look good over the years." - Dick Durock

master swordsman

Sword of Doom (66)
The Criterion Collection is set to release Kihachi Okamoto’s masterpiece on (region 1) DVD in the coming months. After pushing back the long-awaited release of Kurosawa's Kagemusha (80) to March 2005 (and also starring the incomparable Tatsuya Nakadai), it is good to know that some of the more classic entries in the genre are finally getting the proper treatment.

From imdb: "Ryunosuke is a sociopathic samurai without compassion or scruples. When he is scheduled for an exhibition match at his fencing school, the wife of his opponent begs Ryunosuke to throw the match, offering her own virtue in trade. Ryunosuke accepts her offer, but kills her husband in the match. Over time, Ryunosuke is pursued by the brother of the man he killed. The brother trains with the master fencer Shimada. In the meantime, however, Ryunosuke earns the enmity of the band of assassins he runs with, and it becomes a question of who shall face him in final conflict."

This is a haunting and ultimately unforgettable film that has always lived in the shadows of Kurosawa's great works in the same genre. Okamoto (who is still alive and working) never achieved the level of success as his contemporary, Akira Kurosawa, partly because his films were more "Japanese" in structure than Kurosawa's, who's films were almost always better recieved in the West than in his native country. Sword of Doom was made one year after Okamoto's other great sword-fighting masterpiece: Samurai Assassin (65) also starring the immortal, Toshiro Mifune. How ironic is it then that this film is also set to be released (2/8/05) by Koch Entertainment, along with Criterion's Sword of Doom edition (3/15/05)? Well, on second thought - I don't know if it's ironic, but it is fucking cool. And it's about fucking time. Okamoto's work deserves to finally be seen by a greater audience. And thanks to Criterion and Koch, He may finally get the respect that he's due. Kinji Fukasaku (Battle Royale 00, The Yakuza Papers 73), who practically invented the modern "yakuza film", had to die (1/12/03) before he was finally recognized as the master film-maker that he was. At least Okamoto is still alive and kicking to see his films be re-evaluated by a new generation. Maybe all of the young battle-hungry cinema-goers who thought Kill Bill was an original idea will stumble on these classics one day and finally realize that there's a good reason Tarantino (and countless others) have been ripping these films off: there has never been anything like them, before or after. Period.

Also available by Okamoto on DVD: Zatoichi #20 - Zatoichi Meets Yojimbo (70) starring Shintarô Katsu and Toshiro Mifune (my favorite of the long-running Zatoichi series, and possibly the best out of them all).


Director, Kihachi Okamoto and Sword of Doom star, Tatsuya Nakadai

Who's your favorite Rusty? a poll:
Russell "Rusty" Griswold (from the Vacation films), that is...

1. Anthony Michael Hall (Vacation, 83)

2. Jason Lively (European Vacation, 85)

3. Johnny Galecki (Christmas Vacation, 89)

4. Ethan Embry (Vegas Vacation, 97)


please post your pick under COMMENTS

classic film of the week

European Vacation (85) aka: National Lampoon's European Vacation, directed by: Amy Heckerling, written by: John Hughes and Robert Klane, starring: Chevy Chase (Clark Wilhelm Griswold, Jr.), Beverly D'Angelo (Ellen Griswold), Dana Hill (Audrey Griswold) and Jason Lively (Russell 'Rusty' Griswold) with: John Astin, William Zabka, Robbie Coltrane, Mel Smith, Victor Lanoux and Eric Idle.

Trivia (from imdb): In this film, the family name is Griswald, with an "a". In the other Vacation films, their name is Griswold. The U.S. poster art was done by Boris Vallejo, famous for his Heavy Metal covers. The literal translation of the Italian billboard featuring Ellen's (Beverly D'Angelo) half-naked picture is "The Woman in the Shower". Dana Barron and Anthony Michael Hall were asked to reprise their roles from the first movie. Hall instead opted to do Weird Science (85) and the producers decided to cast two new actors in the roles. It is revealed in the intro, on his passport, that Clark's middle name is Wilhelm. Clark wears a sweater from "Walley World", the Griswolds' destination in the first film, Vacation (83).

Clark Griswold: "What are we looking for?"
Audrey Griswold: "Sex dad."
Clark Griswold: "That'll do Audrey."

Clark Griswold: "There it is, kids, the motherland."
Rusty Griswold: "Dad, Grandma's from Chicago."
Clark Griswold: "Shut up, Russ."

If anything, European Vacation proved that a sequel can be just as funny and original as it's predecessor. I love this film. It may not be cinematic art, but it always makes me laugh. In a way, it is art. For this kind of film to be consistantly funny and to contain as many memorable passages as it does, you have to ask yourself the question: why am I afraid to tell people this is one of my favorite films? Well, life is short, and I've never been modest about liking a Chevy Chase film before: European Vacation is one of my favorite films (in case you didn't already know). There I said it. And now I'm going to sleep easy.

Also, the film introduced most of the Western world to a little known musical artist by the name of: Plastic Bertrand. The song Ca Plane Pour Moi (This Life's For Me) was the song that appeared in the film as the Griswold's (or "Griswalds") were taking-in the Louve (in the second quickest tour of an art museum ever put on film - following Godard's Bande à part, 64). It's a snappy little three minute French punk song that once you hear it, you will never get it out of your head...for the rest of your life.

Allez hop
la mama
quel panard
quelle vibration
De s'envoyer sur le paillasson
lime
ruine
vide
comble
You are the king of the divan
qu'elle me dit en passant
(Ouh
Ouh
Ouh) I'm the king of the di - van
Ca plane pour moi
Ca plane pour moi

the return of Michael Keaton

White Noise (05) trailer
directed by Geoffrey Sax (Tipping the Velvet 02), written by Niall Johnson, starring: Michael Keaton, Chandra West, Deborah Kara Unger and Ian McNeice

From scifimoviepage.com: "MICHAEL KEATON plays a successful architect Jonathan Rivers, whose peaceful existence is shattered by the unexplained disappearance and death of his wife, Anna (CHANDRA WEST). Jonathan is eventually contacted by a man (IAN MCNIECE), who claims to be receiving messages from Anna through EVP, the process through which the dead communicate with the living through household recording devices. These extraordinary recordings, captured by people all over the world, seem to confirm what many of us have dared to believe: it is possible for the dead to communicate with us. At first sceptical, Jonathan then becomes convinced of the messages’ validity, and is soon obsessed with trying to contact her on his own. His further explorations into EVP and the accompanying supernatural messages unwittingly open a door to another world, allowing something uninvited into his life."

What was the last good movie that Michael Keaton starred in? I'll tell you. It was: Live From Baghdad, a film produced and aired on the cable network HBO. White Noise marks Keaton's return to the big screen (in a starring role) for some time. Keaton is just one of those actors who gives everything he's got to a role. The problem is, if the role is even slightly under-written, or at worse - just plain under-developed, than Keaton will come off as just plain bad. Look at films like: Desperate Measures (98), My Life (93), One Good Cop (91) and the Paper (94). Keaton does great work in all four films, but because the films themselves were flimsy, Keaton comes off as bad in them. Then there are the films that Keaton has still not recieved the credit for that he is over-due: Clean and Sober (88), Pacific Heights (90) and Much Ado About Nothing (93).

So where does White Noise fit into all this? More than a few reviewers have already said that the film is chilling and very authentic (in regards to the para-normal subject matter). When was the last time that Hollywood turned in a good - make that "great" ghost story? It sure as hell wasn't The Mothman Prophecies (02) or Dragonfly (02). The Sixth Sense (99) and The Others (01) I felt were a bit over-rated. So, where does that put us? You would have to go back to Jack Clayton's 1961 masterpiece, The Innocents with Deborah Kerr for that. So, it looks like we are over-due for a new masterpiece in the genre. Will Geoffrey Sax's film do more than deliver a few good scares or chills? It's also been getting some negative feed-back, some calling it a big-screen X-files rip-off. Well, considering that the X-files hasn't been really good since the first season, I'll take those comparisons with a grain of salt. In any case, the film opens nationally this week, and it's sure to be a big winner once it hits DVD (no doubt in a few months).

From imdb: "The 'White Noise' of the title refers to a phenomenon known as EVP (Electronic Voice Phenomena). Listen carefully, believers will tell you, and in amidst the white noise of a detuned radio you might hear voices...and in amidst the white noise of a detuned television, you might see faces. These, they'll tell you, are the voices and faces of the dead."

Keaton's Best:

Night Shift (82) ****
Mr. Mom (83) ****1/2
Johnny Dangerously (84) ****
Gung Ho (86) ****1/2
Beetle Juice (88) *****
Clean and Sober (88) ****1/2
The Dream Team (89) ****
Batman (89) ****
Pacific Heights (90) ****
One Good Cop (91) **1/2
Batman Returns (92) ****
Much Ado About Nothing (93) ****1/2
My Life (93) **
The Paper (94) **1/2
Multiplicity (96) ***
Jackie Brown (97) *****
Desperate Measures (98) **1/2
Out of Sight (98) ****
Jack Frost (98) no stars
Live From Baghdad (02) *****

coming soon: Game 6 (05) and Herbie: Fully Loaded (05)

[Trying to get Kenny to give up his security blanket in Mr. Mom]
Jack Butler: "I understand that you little guys start out with your woobies and you think they're great... and they are, they are terrific. But pretty soon, a woobie isn't enough. You're out on the street trying to score an electric blanket, or maybe a quilt. And the next thing you know, you're strung out on bedspreads Ken. That's serious."

family business

Fantastic Four (05) behind-the-scenes

Directed by Tim Story, written by Michael France and Mark Frost, starring: Ioan Gruffudd as Reed Richards/Mr. Fantastic, Michael Chiklis as Ben Grimm/The Thing, Jessica Alba as Susan Storm/The Invisible Woman, Chris Evans as Johnny Storm/The Human Torch and Julian McMahon as Victor Von Doom/Doctor Doom

From imdb: "When an experimental space voyage goes awry, four people are changed by cosmic rays. Reed Richards, inventor and leader of the group gains the ability to stretch his body, and takes the name, Mr. Fantastic. His girlfriend, Sue Storm, gains the ability to turn invisible and create force fields, becoming the Invisible Woman. Her little brother Johnny Storm gains the ability to control fire, including covering his own body with flame, like a Human Torch. Pilot Ben Grimm is turned into a super-strong rocky Thing. Together, they use their unique powers to explore the strange aspects of the world, and to foil the evil plans by the likes of Doctor Doom, which is who the villain of this film will be. Even as they deal with the various threats that arise to threaten Earth's peace, the Four must also deal with the pressures of fame as the world's most famous superheroes, and the realities of being a super-powered family..."

From PageWise: "First published in 1961, the title continues, starring the same characters to the current day. The FF, as they’re known to their fans, have gone through some remarkable changes in the last forty years, yet remained consistent to the original vision of their creators. The Fantastic Four was an atypical superhero group right from the beginning. They wore no costumes, and made no attempt to keep their identities secret. In fact, they bickered among themselves all the time. The writer and co-creator of the book, Stanley Lieber, who now used the pen name Stan Lee, wrote the four as more of a family than a team, and this family fought each other as hard as any real one. The FF got uniforms by their fourth issue, along with a high-tech headquarters and gadgets by the ton. In another dose of reality though, Stan Lee gave the FF the money problems that all have, even to the point of having them lose the headquarters they thought they owned.

No article on the FF would be complete without mentioning their greatest adversary, Doctor Doom. Victor Von Doom was born in the hinterlands of Bavaria to a gypsy tribe. A genius on the par of Reed Richards, the two were actually college roommates briefly. Von Doom, suspicious of others, especially those near his own much valued intellect, interrupted Richards going over some of Von Doom’s notes. Flying into a rage, Von Doom evicted him from his laboratory, and when Richards tried to warn him of a dangerous miscalculation, Von Doom ignored him. The experiment blew up in his face, literally, and Von Doom was forced to leave the university. This was merely the first of many wrongs for which he would blame Reed Richards. Von Doom wandered the world after this, learning everything he could. Eventually he concluded that the only way to save the world was to rule it, and sealing himself inside a gray metal suit of armor, he set out to do just that.

The FF and Doctor Doom have clashed many, many times over the years, and no doubt they will clash again in the future. The Fantastic Four have saved the entire world, even the entire universe several times though they hardly receive the acclaim one would expect for such heroism. They still go on, as they have for the last forty years, and, given the slow passage of comic book time, as they probably will for the next forty years." (Rick Beckley)

That bastion of legitimate Hollywood reporting (joke), Aint It Cool News (AICN) once claimed that George Clooney was set to star as Reed Richards, but that claim was soon debunked by SuperHeroHype.com. There was also a rumor at one time that Tim Robbins was set to play Doctor Doom and Paul Walker was also in the running for Johnny Storm. Not being a devoted fan of FF, I have absolutely no expectations for this. To be honest, it looks like a kid's movie. I'm sure that Fox will pull out all the stops for the production (they should considering how much they've saved by casting actors like Chiklis and Gruffudd) and turn in another semi-agreeable comic book adaptation. But does this have the power to last beyond an opening weekend box-office? And frankly, seeing this project come to life has about the same creative appeal as covering your eyes, opening a Marvel Comic Universe book to a random page with the intention of making a feature film, and pointing a finger at the first unfilmed comic you flip to, "Spider-Man, shit - try again..." Still, the biggest draw for fans may be seeing that Latverian tyrant himself, Doctor Doom, finally come to life on the big screen. For everybody else, it's Alba - who looks pretty good in those tights, and let's just hope that she doesn't stay invisible for too long...

back in black

"...the third film is very, very, very dark. It's not a happy movie by any stretch of the imagination. It's a tragedy. Ultimately the final story is between Yoda, Obi-Wan, Anakin and the Padmé. It's really their story. Those four characters." - George Lucas

As we near the release date of ROTS (May 19th 2005), alot of news and rumors are hitting the circuit. You can be sure of one thing, the (spoiler) images released here are just too good to be true!

The soundtrack to the film is set to be released on May 3rd, 2005, and the set will include a bonus DVD (content unknown at this time). You may not be able to hear that familiar John Williams score yet, but you can read all about your favorite characters and their association with the new film right here.

Also, here is some interesting news on the new Star Wars television series that is to follow the release of the new film.

And if you've ever wondered just what the hell a Sith is (or a Jedi for that matter) than you should definitely check out this illuminating article called: "Brief History of the Jedi and Sith, Organized by Mike LJ, Based on George Lucas’ Vision of Star Wars."

Last but not least, here is some info on the new Star Wars Fruit Snacks (and other products), coming to a super market near you.

the Dark Side is no laughing matter...

white knights

Kingdom of Heaven (05) directed by Ridley Scott, starring: Orlando Bloom, Liam Neeson, Jeremy Irons and Eva Green

From imdb: "During the Crusades of the 12th Century, Balian of Ibelin (Bloom), a young blacksmith in Jerusalem, rises to protect his people from foreign invaders." Hans Zimmer was originally attached as the film's composer, but was replaced by Harry Gregson-Williams. A few weeks after this, the opposite occurred for another film: Zimmer replaced Gregson-Williams for the scoring duties of Madagascar (05).

The sheer presence of Neeson and Irons makes this interesting enough for me to get excited about it, but is Orlando Bloom capable of carrying a film all on his own? Only time shall tell. In the meantime, check out the trailer.

The Best of Sir Ridley Scott (as director):

The Duellists (77) *****
Alien (79) *****
Blade Runner (82) *****
Legend (85) ***1/2
Black Rain (89) ****
Thelma & Louise (91) ****1/2
1492: Conquest of Paradise (92) ***1/2
White Squall (96) ***1/2
G.I. Jane (97) **
Gladiator (00) ****1/2
Hannibal (01) *1/2
Black Hawk Down (01) *****
Matchstick Men (03) ****1/2

and coming soon: A Good Year (05) and Tripoli (07) with Ben Kingsley

"A friend of mine says, 'Art's like a shark. You've got to keep swimming, or else you drown.' Keep bouncing around. People always ask me what's the plan. There is no plan. I go to what fascinates me next."

On why his movies don't have sex scenes: "Sex is boring unless you're doing it."

For your enjoyment:

Million Dollar Baby theatrical trailer